Crazy as a Loom

Friday, April 27, 2012

Just wait.

A quiet house.  A cuppa tea.  Roy looking out the window.  Just the tapping of my fingers on the keys.
Sometimes I find myself longing for moments like this to just go on for a while longer.
Just to have  the opportunity to have a day uninterrupted.  No chatter.  No questions.  No direction in particular.
Nothing I have to do, and nowhere I have to be, and not one person wanting even one thing from me.
I could do anything I wanted to do, or nothing at all.
Take a nap.
Bake some muffins.  Weave a while.
Google a hundred things.
Scan through old Handwoven mags for inspiration.
Snuggle with my Roy boy on the couch.
Stay in my pajamas.

If you have a quiet house, then you don't miss it.  In fact, you probably don't even realize what joy you possess.  You have grown accustomed.  You take it for granted.

But if you don't have it, you miss it terribly.  When you get a snippet of solitude, you long for more.
You're painfully aware of what's lacking in your life.

As a kid, I was always comfortable with being alone.
Solitude never bothered me.  I was always capable, and happy, entertaining myself.
Still am.
Some people get nervous with that.  They are uncomfortable  around you, like maybe there is something inherently 'wrong' with you.
But I think that I figured something out when I was very young, that has stood me in good stead, so to speak, something that is often learned much later, down a rocky road.
I am grateful that solitude feels so good.

And as I get older, I find myself looking back longingly at the times I spent hiking in the woods.  I grew up doing it, in fact most days were spent climbing up and down the mountain behind my house.

The Adirondacks were  a source of incredible solitude, always a sweet feeling of home.
So while I can't buy my dream cabin on a pond in the wilderness, I can enjoy the forests and the ponds that belong to the great State of New York.

And who really owns anything the end?

So solitude, listen up.   I'm coming to find you.
We're gonna have a great summer.

And the winner is:
I've been reading your blog for a while and now it's bookmarked so I don't miss an entry. One of these days I'll learn how to be a real entity in the bog world and not just anonymous . . . I'm not a weaver (alas), am a huge cat lover all my life. But as I read the comments here I thought, what makes your blog special is YOU--you being you, and your honesty. That spicy, determined, gifted, wise and seasoned woman who is you. So just keep sharing from your heart and soul. Can't get better than that. And of course we're all rooting for HH to leave for good. So very sorry for your suffering. Sending all good thoughts for healing and health your way, hoping acupuncture may be the solution.

YAY, me some info, so I can send your Anywhere Mat to you post haste.  And thank you for the lovely comments.   You are too sweet.


MarthaVA said...

Congrats to Becky (I'm envious!).

Love solitude...I don't get enough. Hubby works from home, and we share the his voice is ALWAYS going on the phone....annoying! Oh, and his chair squeaks and drives me NUTS! Good thing I love

I'm NOT loving the new blogger....
Enjoy your solitude and your weekend. Yes, NY is a beautiful state, and I miss it!


Lydia La La said...

I love that you joined my blog "Well.... you're reasonably intelligent". Thank you so much. I have stalked your blog for a long time and love your writing. I admire your work and logical outlook on life. I have felt the pain of your headache. The photos you put up show me the wonderful area you live and your lovely home.
My first ever internet friend lives in Middletown NY state! We have been friends since 1999!

Maybe acupuncture is the answer to the HH. My mother used to suffer horribly from them for years. She had a course of it and it totally cured her of the mongrels. Keep well.

Country Girl said...

What a beautiful comment from Becky. So sweet. Congratulations to her ~

I recognize the water shot. Ah, Maine ~

Hilary said...

A lovely post, H. Congrats to Becky who left such a sweet comment.

sharon said...

I know what you mean about quite and solitude. I love when the grandchildren come for a visit but I'm so glad when they leave. Peace and quiet never sounded so good!

KarenInTheWoods said...

congrats to Becky!!!

I can't imagine people saying they are bored or have too much time on their hands either. I find too many exciting things to try and make and learn about, who can be bored?

Being alone and creative and at peace is more comforting to me.

Some like busy schedules and calendars full of events, obligations, gatherings and meetings and doings and parties.

Sigh... no time to weave if you do all that too!

Karen and Steve
(Our Blog) RVing: Small House... BIG Backyard

Friko said...

I have all the solitude a person could want and I revel in it. There is one thing though, which I'm beginning to notice: I am becoming ever more silent. Literally, I don't say much at all now. Maybe that is taking things a bit too far.

I too am an 'older' person, and can't be bothered with the fuss and bother that comes with always being in company.

Just let me say that I share your sentiments, expressed so beautifully here, to the utmost.

Anonymous said...

I've been living all by myself for the past 2 years...if you don't count the pets!

B.L.I.S.S. to come home from a noisy day full of chat to a quiet house, where chat is NOT expected. Ahhhh.....

Happy to hear that HH has subsided, hope it is BANISHED and soon!

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