Crazy as a Loom

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Moving on.

I am finding that my attitude about blog posts is similar to my new attitude about my life.
l have never been this relaxed, ever.
Maybe it's getting older, or maybe not. 
Maybe it started with the crack to the skull four years ago, or the surgeries that followed.
I'm not sure, but I know this, I am no longer driven like I was.

Oh sure, I still like to be productive.  I still go overboard in ways that make other people raise their eyebrows.
But things HAVE changed.

I am happy to spend time "not working".
I am soaking up happy times like a sponge.
There are so many more reasons to be alive, than to work like a dog.
This girl reminds me every time I look at her.

I am taking cues from Sydney, who is happy all the time.
And she does nothing.

I take time to drink ice tea with fresh lemon on my screened porch, with a book.
And Roy.
And Sydney.

If I am moved, I go in and weave another towel.   My hip is fairly happy with this, and I weave until my neck is not.
I find that one towel, big break, another towel, another a sequence that works well.  
It also allows me to do other things, something I have not given myself permission to do in a very long time.

Sometimes, I decide to cook.   The other day I made some chick pea/green pea falafels, and had them over salad. On the porch.  Oh, the decadence.

I am in a strange place that I am sure all of us get to.   I love my family, but understand clearly that their lives are their own.  As we get older, our role in the family changes.
But always, they mean everything.

I treat myself to crazy things, now that I have time to appreciate them.

I make sure to keep positive people in my life, and stay away from people who disappoint.
It's easier that way.

Letting go is one of the hardest things I'll ever do.
Letting go of the past, letting go of things that you thought defined you, things that you thought you couldn't live without.

Truth is, you can live without a lot.  And even better, when you let go of stuff that has become a drudge, you open yourself up to so much more,  horizons you didn't know existed.

All my life, I have used work as a reason to be alive, as a goal to keep moving, as a balm for bad times.
No more.
I am now settling in to a rhythm of days that soothe, and sustain, and make me happy for today, and excited for tomorrow.

Ah, now isn't that better??


Deb said...

What you've written here should be on everyone's wall. You have always been an inspiration and that continues on. Now don't take up with Syd too much as we are not ready to have you leave blogging altogether. You would be missed by many.Just enjoy it as you now embrace your 'new' life. Hot 'nuf for ya? It's +32C today in Ontario with high humidity. "blah!" Hugs, Deb

Devon said...

I have been having these thoughts lingering at the back of my mind... I am still in the work too much, have too much phase and desperately want to change that now. Experience has shown me that if I don't make the change myself, it will be done for me. Better get a move on then!!!

Angela Tucker said...

Thank you for a wonderful post. I have started to slow down, though I still work full time and care for my dad, I have given a wide berth to those that add too much drama. I have stopped caring that I am not the social butterfly that others expect. It is okay if I stay home and enjoy my crafts and my flowers. Have an amazing day!

ain't for city gals said...

Much, much better...I'm right there with you...except my little one is called Henry...they steal your heart!

Tyche's Minder said...

"letting go of things that you thought defined you"

This is hard hard lesson.

Candy Duell said...

I loved your post, how right you are about letting go. Your Grandchildren are growing so fast they are all so cute! Enjoy your day!

Sharon said...

Ain't that the truth?!! And now that I've packed away a lot of stuff waiting for the move, I realize I don't miss it at all. I saved out some books because I agree with you, a day isn't complete without them. Currently reading The Storied Life of A.J. Fikrey and loving it!

Mary said...

Thank you for your inspiring message. It helps me sort my life out.

Sweetpea said...

I just love this post, Hilary! So much good food for thought.
Funny how life's new additions (like g'daughter) & observing our animals
can bring on a special (perhaps necessary) perspective ....

Your towels are gorgeous & its lovely to read how you're finding
your way with working - and mending ;>)

Karen said...

Awesome post... yes, yes, yes! :-)

sue said...

Amen, sister!

Christine said...

I agree, this should be framed. We are certainly hitting the same stage of life. However, you are better able to articulate it than I am.

mudmaven said...

Oh my! How this reflects what should be ... in everyone's life. Thank you so much for putting it all in words that convey this meaning, this feeling. ~chris

Rain said...

Wonderful post- should be framed on our walls in case we forget for a moment the important things.........

Daryl said...

love those dishes, i hope you play on using them every day not just saving them for a special occasion ... and i adore the couch and pillows patterns .. love love love

Avalanche Looms / Susan Johnson said...

Haha, Hilary,. You taking it slow is like me on an unusually productive day.
Lucky that life/ living isn't a race

Shuttle, Hook and Needle said...

I've been a collector all of my life and have always enjoyed it till now.
It all became too much of a burden. Now that we are having to move letting go has surprised me on how much freer and easier I feel.
Good for you on slowing down and enjoying it!

moosecraft said...

Indeed... much, MUCH better! :-) Words well spoken... thank you for taking the time to write it all out... enjoy your peaceful days! :-)

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