Back again

Summer is gone, and boy, was it an expensive one for me.

New roof on this side of the house, which has been the only part of my roof that was still slate.

And underneath it ...........wooden shingles, and about a million square nails.

But it's done.....chimney capped forever never to be used again, but repointed so it looks good!

New flashing around the chimney, new ridge pole.........done.

On top of that, a new gas furnace, since my chimney is defunct.

My savings dwindles in the face of necessity.

As usual, I am sickeningly hopeful.  What the hell is wrong with me, I wonder.

But there seems always something to be thankful for.  So I persist in 

holding on to those good thoughts.

A few months ago, I saw this photo, I have yet to find out where it originated from,

despite lengthy searches.

It is a picture of different colored eggs from different breeds of chickens, and it 

just mesmerized me.

I wanted to recreate these colors in my weaving.

I was not at all sure that I could.

But once again, I persisted.  You've probably noticed by now, if you've been 

following my blog, that persistence is my middle name.

And here is what I came up with.

Here is the finished towel.

The first 21 that came off the loom sold overnight on my FB biz page, and the second

21 are waiting for the guild show.

For my last expenditure of this very pricey summer, I decided to replace the back

fence of the dog yard.  The rest of it is black chain link 5 ft high, but this one stretch

has always been stockade fence.

The old one had been there for 15 plus years, and was beginning to look a little ragged.

I was afraid some day I would look out there and parts of it would be lying on the ground.

So here is the new fence, and hopefully it will last for a long time.

My other weaving venture into towels, has been my Christmas tree towels.

I have 20 of those waiting for the guild show which is November 15-17 at 

Pat's Barn in North Greenbush, NY.

And if that's not enough to keep me busy, I've been doing Basic Weaving workshops

again, and they are filling up fast.

It's good to get more people to be in love with weaving. and it's good 

to fill the studio up with lots of good energy.

Sorry I've been so absent.  I think often that no one reads it, so why bother, but then 

I know that there a few of you faithful followers out there, and then I feel bad for 

not doing better.....

I'll try harder.

Surprise

Well, I haven't blogged in a couple of weeks, and leave it to Blogger to change how you 

upload photos........

Always a challenge.

The photos are kind of random, but I'm just trying to keep it real....this is my life.

My new favorite lunch.....boiled eggs, avocado, cherry tomatoes and sriracha.

So, so good.  And a protein boost for this vegetarian.

I haven't done much gardening this year, with my new hip, but my garlic did 

marvelously, and it's drying on the inside porch........enough to share with my daughters, and 

keep some for myself.

The rest of these pictures are of my collection of daylilies......I have quite a few, and 

they really need to be divided.

With all the bad luck I had last month, there were some sunny spots that 

encouraged me.

Out of the blue, I was given a loom by a gentleman who just popped into the 

studio one day.  His wife had bought it years ago, never used it, and now was unable to.

It was in their way.  

I was surprised to see that it was a lovely loom, an oak Schacht, and I new right away that I did not need it,

and that maybe it was just the gift I needed.

Last year I bought a Megado loom, a beautiful, and expensive loom.

I bought it with the 'mechanical' dobby, which is just like it sounds.....a lot of work.

So I knew that at some point, if I was going to keep the loom, and maybe love it,

that I would have to bite the bullet and buy the expensive electronic dobby for it.

I couldn't justify the cost, so I waited.

 I  quickly put the gifted Schacht loom up for sale........

I sold it in just a few days for my asking price, along with its bench and a couple of 

other items.

Then I ordered the new electronic dobby for my Megado..... with the money from the 

free loom, it ended up costing me $28, 

plus I had to pay for the shipping.

I'm a happy weaver.

I think the universe sent me that little surprise, and I am grateful.

I am finally starting to get some walking in, now that the temperatures have come down just a bit.

That was my dream before I had this hip replacement, but then my knees cranked up, then the temperatures and humidity did as well.

Just to walk.....that is all I wanted.

So let's see if I can get it done.  

Moving along

(Random studio pictures)

Sometimes I think I am being tested, then other times I think no, it's just life, and life can be tricky any time at all.

A few months ago, we had a huge wind storm, and there was a lot of banging on my roof.  Apparently, the cap on the chimney came apart.

In addition, I started having  this issue in my upstairs hallway, with creosote stains coming down the walls.  I knew it was a chimney issue, and I assumed it was related to the chimney cap.

So I called in the chimney people.  They were quick to respond, and very pleasant, but their news was so not good.

First of all, the person I trusted to put the chimney cap on, L's brother in fact, did the worst, and cheapest, job possible.  So far, the chimney people, and a roof contractor have seen it, and were both blown away, that anyone would do that.

Secondly, the ridge cap, put on years back by another contractor, was not a real ridge cap at all, and thus leaking, as was the crappy flashing job around the chimney.

The bottom line is:   

The chimney is over 200 years old, dangerous, and cannot be used at all, ever.

The chimney needs to be repointed, and permanently capped, the roof ridge cap and flashing etcetera all needs fixing.

To vent my oil furnace out the wall requires something called a side slip vent that is very pricey.

My plumbing and heating guy, who has not steered me wrong in 20 years, suggests ditching the oil furnace, and for $4400 getting a new gas furnace that can vent out the wall, is cleaner, more efficient, and will save me lots of $ in fuel in the long run.

So furnace is coming tomorrow.

Got the quotes from the roof guy, and while I am sure they are fair, they stopped me in my tracks.

$8000 for all the roof work.

And I didn't mention the plaster damage in the upstairs hall......from the water pouring down.....that's another $1900...

Don''t bother adding it all up....it's nauseating.

Then yesterday I had no water.  I panicked thinking I needing a new well pump, since mine is about 44 years old.   That would be a $2000+ price tag, and I am hemorrhaging money at this point.   But the well people came yesterday, and it was not the pump, but a pressure switch on the side of my water tank in the basement.  $278.

The upside of that is that after years of having crappy water pressure in this old house, I now have incredible water pressure, which I am thoroughly enjoying.

Then the other night, the hose that connects the toilet upstairs, to the water line, sprung a huge leak, and water was spraying everywhere.

It just never ends.

All this has been overwhelming, but I realized, doable.  The hardest part is not having Bill here to do it all with me.  That is so true about problem being half as bad when you have someone to share it with.  It sounds cliche, but in reality, it has a bite.

As I sit here bemoaning the bad things that have

befallen me, once again, the little voice in my head, tells me to stop.

It reminds me of ALL the things I have to be thankful for.

My personal opinion, which I have probably shared with you all before, is that we Americans are spoiled.

Spoiled rotten.

For the most part.

We have so much, and yet it is never enough.  

We spend our lives acquiring money, and property and 

STUFF.

We forget what is important.

I know all these problems won't last, and I know that they really aren't 

tragic.  I just have to muddle through them as best I can, and I have to look around me, and practice gratitude for all the amazing things in my life.

Above all, I am grateful for my serenity, an inner strength, that I believe we all have, that gets me up every morning, and pushes me into the new day.

Onward!

I have been long absent again.  

I frequently ask myself if I want to keep blogging, and 

I haven't yet come up with a good answer to that.

I have made a commitment to myself to not talk politics, on FB or anywhere else,

for my own sanity..

And sometimes I don't feel like I have much good to talk about.  This

year has been hard.

The good news is that my HIP is healed, and feeling good.

The bad news is that making my legs even, after so many years of having 

one leg 1/2" shorter than the other, has made my KNEES very angry.

For some time, they were grossly swollen, but I think at last they are starting to adjust.

I have had to adjust myself, wanting to get walking again, 

but finding that I have to do it gradually, and not 

jump right into it, like I would usually do.

Last week I went for a boat ride on Lake George, the "Queen of American Lakes", 

it has recently ranked the cleanest lake in the United States.  Pretty impressive.

You can see to the bottom in shallow water, and it is beautiful.

I do admit though that I am not really a fan of "speeding" down the lake in 

a boat.  I much prefer a more meandering type of boating. 

I guess I'm officially old.

We traveled to the end of the lake, where I grew up.  I was stunned

at how much it had changed, and in my mind, not in a good way.

I guess I prefer my memories of that place, to the way it is now, 

and I reminded myself that I don't have to see it if I don't want to.

My perennial garden is looking like the cottage garden that 

I envisioned when I started it.

The bee balm has multiplied like crazy, and so have lots of other plants.

I love the crowded, unplanned look it has.

Walking between the plants is crowded, but I love it.

Missouri primroses have popped up everywhere, even in the middle of the Lamb's Ears.

One of several phlox in my garden.

And a sweet hydrangea.....one of several......they are my faves.

In the studio, I am weaving more, and just did a "sewing" day, to clean off

my sewing table.  

This is a hand dyed Möbius shawl I just finished.

But I have to admit, for the most part, I am settling into my life.

It seems to me, that the last two years, without Bill, have been a practice

session that I really didn't want.

To be honest, there have been a lot of times, that I really had no idea

what I was doing.

Or more importantly, why.

The 25th  was two years to the day, and I realized that I am becoming

accustomed to this life I have now.

It has a rhythm of its own, unlike my life before, but it is my life, for sure.

I am also accepting that everything that happens here in my old house, 

is for me to deal with.

Whining about it doesn't change it.

Ha! Who knew.

Healing

Every thing I do takes at least twice as long as it used to.   I am still using a cane, because  walking without it is pretty painful.

So showering, doing dishes, doing laundry, feeding dogs, feeding  my  outside cat and his friends, cooking dinner, getting the garbage and recycles out, everything, is an event.

Today is  three weeks since my surgery.  I have already started driving myself to PT this week, and yes, I have been weaving.  Thank God, or I think that mentally, I would be in worse shape.

I don't weave for long, but it is so good for me.

I am also planning ......future weaving projects, and future weaving workshops...........that's a good sign.

I know that gardening most likely will not be in my future this summer........and I am grateful that I have an amazing kid who is keeping my lawns mowed and trimmed and looking awesome.   It hurts a bit financially, but I think that it's worth it not to have to worry about it, or actually, even think about it.

I feel so guilty that Naya and Willie aren't getting walks, and haven't for months.   They deserve better, and I just can't do a thing about it.

They are my ever present companions though, and I don't know what on earth I would do without them.

They call them rescue dogs, but truly, there are days when they rescue me.

I am not sure what happens after a surgical "assault", but I do know that it's unwise 

to underestimate it.

I was at PT the other day, and I told my therapist that I was struggling with the pain, it just wasn't getting better very quickly.   

He said..........."does it feel like they cut off your leg and reattached it?"

Horrified, I said, "What?"

He repeated.

" Does it feel like they cut off your leg and reattached it?  Because that's what they 

did.  And it's only been two weeks."

Enough said.

I am also amazed at how tired I am since surgery........just exhausted much of the time.  Naps feel like heaven every one.

I also can't concentrate long enough to read a book.

So Netflix and Britbox are my friends, and mindless work like Kumihimo, making cords

that I don't need.

I have yet to get my screen porch  ready.  The floor is mostly the issue.....it needs sweeping, vacuuming and mopping, all things that are difficult for me right now.

The furniture has been covered up with plastic all winter, and all the cushions and chair covers and such are washed and put away in the attic loft.  This is the first time ever that I have done that in the fall.  I always waited and did it now, in the spring, but for some reason, I got organized last November, and I am so glad that I did.  Once the floor is cleaned, I won't be far from being able to use the porch.

The dogs love it, I love it.

They run in and out of the dog door a thousand times a day, and I don't have to let them in or out.  Marvelous.

I am struck lately by the incessant need of the mind to project into the future.  Should I do this, or should I do that.

What if I moved here, or changed this, or started this, or gave up this........a constant barrage of what to do, or how to do things, in a time that has not arrived.

It is such a total and complete waste of time.

As we get older, it gets even more ridiculous.  Years ago, when I was in the midst of extricating myself from an alcoholic husband, I had a sign over my sewing machine, it said, "Stay in the day".     It's solid advice, and one that I still, after all these years, need to remember.

Now that I am 77.........WTH..............is there any sense at all to wasting one minute planning for a future that is more tenuous by the day????   I think not.

I heard some good advice the other day, it said, "Every day, do what you do, and do it well", because that's all there is.

I think I am going to make a few little cards, and position them in places around the house, that say, once again, "Stay in the day."  It's so simple, yet so difficult.

We are bombarded by media telling us to put the future right in front of our faces, even when our logical minds tell us that's crap.

In an effort to decrease inflammation in my old body, I am trying this mushroom coffee.  Lots of reviews say it's very helpful in that regard, as well as lowering cholesterol.  And since I am dead set against taking statins, this is my plan.

I've heard things about how bad it tastes, but I have to say, I like it.

It tastes like coffee, but earthier somehow.  I use a little creamer, and drink one a day.

We shall see.  My opinion is that the medical community often throws meds at us, when natural remedies can and often do just as much for us, with less side effects.

I will keep you posted.  I'm planning on drinking it for two months, and getting labs 

drawn, and taking stock of how I feel overall.

I also think about what this "recovery" would be like, if Bill were still 

here.  

Being alone is one thing,

 being without someone you have spent so many years 

with is something else.

And being slightly disabled and recovering alone is truly something I never imagined, 

or saw coming.

Reboot

Photos are random, from the last month or so, as I am not doing a lot right now.

I had my hip replaced last Thursday, the 11th, after dealing with the pain for several months.

The last 3 months were horrific, and I could barely walk, and every step was torture, so you

 can imagine that I was anxious to get it done.

 

The surgery went off well, and my whole experience at Saratoga Hospital was a good one.

My middle daughter picked me up, and I was home by 5:30pm.   She stayed with me until 

Sunday morning, which was an incredible gift.

There's a dog in there.   Willie has a penchant for sleeping while being completely covered up.

That's his chair, which is why it is ratty, and I don't bother to have it recovered.

Nobody sits in it but him.

Before my surgery, I was intent on having the two Louet Davids in the studio warped, and ready to weave.

On the smaller one, I put on this "sherbet" warp, I had a hankering for pastels.

It takes both feet to treadle, so I knew it would come later, but it would be ready.

On the bigger David, I have enough warp for about 20 of these towels, and 

I purposely planned a simpler pattern that requires me only to use my LEFT (good) leg.

I will be able to weave that in 15-20 minute increments to start.

Getting back to normal as soon as possible is good medicine in my opinion.

I am going to PT, and relying on friends for rides.  I won't be able to drive for a while, since it is my right hip that was replaced.

I am walking at home as much as I can, and doing my exercises, and I am intent on doing everything right.

Outside my window, this guy keeps tabs.

Being housebound for the most part, I am grateful for the things I love in my house, one of which is this Oxalis, which I have had for over 20 years.  It was my mother in law's before it was mine.

Every January, I cut it back level wit the top of the pot, and I put it in my attic loft, where it is dark and cool.   I mark my calendar, and take it out March 1st.  I put it back in its sunny window, and water it, and here it is just 6 weeks later.  

Happy.

Proof that we all need a good rest sometimes.

On Sunday, after my middle daughter went home, my youngest daughter came 

with my three youngest grands.

They were excited that I had three new looms that I bought for 

weaving workshops.  

Of course, the two oldest each claimed one for their personal loom, and the weaving began.

There are no words to explain how happy this makes me.

I love how intent they are.

They took their finished samples home to show Dad, because they were very proud of them.

As was I.

On another note, my oldest daughter is destined to have a house full of dogs.

She has three already, but decided that she had to foster this mini Australian shepherd

to keep her out of the shelter.

She is two years old, and lost a front leg.  My grand daughter and bestie have bonded

with her on sight.

I don't think this dog is going anywhere.........guess that's what you call a "failed foster"??????

But it's totally understandable.   

I say "welcome home, pup, you have just won the lottery."

So I'll be here recovering, healing, regrouping for a while.  I am grateful for the doctor and technology that gives me a chance to walk normally again.   

Getting older is often just doing whatever it takes to stay on your feet, and be happy.

On days when I get a tad discouraged about how long it takes, and I get impatient, I remember that I only have to do today, and eventually the todays will stack up and I will get to where I want to be.

I am so thankful for my daughters, and ALL my friends, for their help, their support, their encouragement.  I could NOT do this without them.  It's not fun to feel helpless, or ineffective, or dependent, but if you have to, there is nothing as reassuring as people who care.   And I am blessed to have them in my life.