The labyrinth.

Finally, today, I walked the labyrinth. I can't believe how much I have been looking forward to this, waiting for just enough snow to melt so I could see the rocks. I walked it with my camera, and I walked very, very slowly. I love slowing my brain down and waiting to see what impressions pop up while I am walking. Taking pictures of it gave me lots of different perspectives.
The one thought that occurred to me was this. There are so many times in life when you think you are so close to the answers you are looking for, and yet they are out of reach. You go in all different directions, but try as you might, you just can't quite get there. Like the center of the labyrinth, it looks so close, and yet the path takes you away, then close again, then further away.
The labyrinth is really simple. There is one way in, and one way out. The only thing to do is to decide to enter. That's it. So simple, and yet, it seems, while you are doing it, so circuitous. Kind of like life. If you just take that first step, and trust the process, you will get there. I love the labyrinth, and I want a sign that says "where you might find the center of your heart". That's what my grandson told me it was for, and I think he is right. While I haven't advertised the labyrinth, anyone who comes to the studio is welcome to walk it. It is too good not to share.
This is the stair runner......all 240" of it, resting til next week. Then I will measure it, wind it on again, and finish it.

This red and yellow warp is for placemats. I actually rethreaded it after I wove this, so that the stripe on the right, is matched by another stripe on the left. The fabric I am using is a pale, butter yellow, with roses. I have enough warp to make 6 or 7 sets of placemats. Then I need to make some in neutral colors. I have kind of been stuck on warm colors of late.

I can't say that I have accomplished much this week. But strangely enough, I don't feel guilty about it, like I usually would. I think that age has its benefits. I am coming to think that it is not going to be as hard as I thought to manage my "retirement". As a bona fide workaholic, I have been known to have trouble taking days off. But I am committed to changing that this year.........at last. There are other things to do besides work. Really.
For starters:
I am making sun dresses for the granddaughters this week.
I am starting flower seeds.
Getting the kayaks out of the basement, and putting the racks back on my car.
Walking the dog down by the river, taking pictures.
Reading a book on photography, playing scrabble. Making plans to take some day trips with my grandchildren.
Hopefully, a weekend trip with my husband.
Yes, I have plans.
Not all work.
And it's OK.

Today I admitted that I have limitations. I always hate to do that, but sometimes it just is what it is. I wanted to work on tote bags at the studio, but I had my whole family coming for dinner, and my house was a disaster, and my husband is still in Virginia. So after taking my mother to the grocery store early this morning, I came home and cleaned for several hours. Then I went to the studio, fed the cats, took care of the pellet stove, cleaned the kitchen and did the dishes, and came home again, to bake a cake and make roast beef and yorkshire pudding. the house looks great, we had a wonderful dinner, and we had a terrific time. We talked and laughed til tears ran down our faces. It doesn't get any better than that.
Taking a day off from my regular routine is not something I do easily. I tend to get single minded, and don't know how to relax. I said that to my friend, Sheila, the other day at lunch, and she said, "ya think?" So I guess that is not news to anyone who knows me.
But I am determined to change all that. This weekend was my last Saturday to work as an RN. And I only have two single Fridays to work in February, and 3 single Fridays to work in March. Then, I am done with it. I am weaning myself off, you see. And I am going to start taking days off. One a week, maybe two. OK, probably not two. But one, for sure.
And I am going to make a plan, every week, to do things that are NOT work. Things that have nothing to do with business. I know it won't be easy, and I know that my family and friends don't really believe that it is going to happen, but I am counting on YOU to keep me straight. I promise to report here every week on the wonderful day off I have had.
I am going to pick up my grandchildren, and take them places that I would never have had time for before. I am going to go to the library, and the book store, and I am going to bake wonderful things. I am going to Boston with my husband to watch the Red Sox play, and I am going to plant lovely perennials in my Secret Garden at the studio. I am going to take time to walk the labyrinth, and make a path through the wildflowers. I am going to sit by the pool for the whole afternoon, reading a book. I never thought I would be this excited to be this old, but it is perfect.
Oh, yes. I will work very hard still. I will do that til I die, it's the gene pool, you know. But now that I am not going to be a nurse any longer, I can be a full time weaver, and won't be rushing from one life to another. It is SO time for this. I can have just one life. And I can take a day off.