Change

I am so grateful for the years that I have done this blog..........for all the friendly people I have met, and for the memories that I can turn back to, any time I want.

Today I went to see Lois in the nursing home, where she has ended up.   Another friend of hers, who has been her friend since childhood, drove us over there.

We didn't stay long.

She is in a wheelchair, she clearly can't walk, and can only stand with assist.  She wasn't wearing her glasses, but she did not care one bit.  She didn't know us, and she had no clue where she was, or what we were talking about.

She smiled when she saw me, but I think it was a smile she would have given anyone, who knelt down in front of her.

We both left in tears.   My dear friend, and apprentice of 13 years, who I saw daily, is truly gone.

Only her body remains, and that probably not for long.

Here she is demonstrating weaving at the county fair.

I have so many memories of her.   We spent Monday through Friday every week, together in the studio.  Weekends, we still saw each other because we walked the dogs.

She was one of the kindest hearted people I have ever known.  We talked, we laughed, we groaned about things.  We agreed on politics, so we had lots of discussions about it.

We could talk and talk, or we could just  be comfortable with silence.  Either was ok.

We worked together warping looms and doing shows like a right and left hand, always in sync.

Her presence in my life was a pleasure and a comfort.

There are so many anecdotes in my head about all our day trips, loom rescue, cat rescues, shows, weaving, kayaking, camaraderie.

I am so, so broken this minute, and the only consolation in all of it is that Lois, 

the Lois I have known, my dear friend, is 100% unaware of any of it.

Thank God.

Update

Just an update on what's going on in my life.

One week ago today I fell down the stairs, spent 6 hours in the Emergency Room, and ended up with 2 broken ribs, # 11 and 12.   I also fractured the transverse processes of L 1, 2 and 3.

It's been a tough week.  

When I was in the ER, I was supposed to be upstairs visiting my dear friend, who has been battling Rheumatoid lung for months.

While I was in the ER, I got the call that she had died.  

Thankfully, another friend had taken my place as soon as I called her and told her of my own dilemma.  But still, I was crushed.  I wanted to be with her.  

Luckily, I had gone to see her the night before, and we talked about death, and life, and her situation.   

Yesterday I got a call, from Lois's sister.  Lois had fallen, and the Memory Care Unit that she has been in  for two years, would not accept her back, as she can't really walk.  So now she is in the nursing home.

My head is spinning, my heart is hurting, and my body is suffering from the insult of tossing myself down the stairs.

The positive side of all this is that I have amazing daughters, and amazing friends.  They have been just lovely, and kind, and have gotten me through this, as I am unable to manage a huge list of things.

Sorry this is so short, but I just don't have much more to offer.

I will be back, and do better.

H