Thoughts

Watching the early morning light, I find myself thinking about my mother, what early mornings looked like to her growing up in England, then coming to upstate NY...... how did early mornings make her feel.


 I have long thought that we are not all that special.  Each one of us, a mere speck on this globe.   There is much written about what "matters". 
Does any of it?
Well, I think that all I can do is live my best life. Every day.
That's it.
If at the end of the day, I am satisfied, then that is enough.

I didn't always think this way.  But now I am older.   Those things that my mother used to say, and believe, that I thought odd..........not so odd anymore.
Funny, how age changes your perspective about so much.

My kids are busy.  Their kids are busier.  It is hard to get to see them separately, much less all
together.
I have been trying to orchestrate a family dinner at my house........I live an hour away from all of them.
After a couple of weeks of negotiating who was going to be available, and who could not possibly make it, I have pretty much tossed in the towel.
In the past, I would have been upset, hurt.

Now, I'm like, yeah, ok....that's life.
It's just not a big deal.

It's a giant step when you realize that your children have their own lives, and that is exactly what you wanted for them.
So get on with your own.



I had a perfect day.   A perfect day at least by my standards.

My headache subsided after an hour or so.......... and became my favorite headache.......a "doable" one.

Then after all my morning chores, I wove on an order  for a few hours........

Then I made some soup.

A Detox Crockpot Lentil soup.   Let me tell you, this one is a winner!!

Then I took Naya for a walk in the fields.  I have decided to NOT bitch about the weather this winter, and at the same time, I have made a commitment to get my butt outside every day that it is not snowing sideways.

Funny about perspective.   In 2011, when my Eddie passed, we got Roy.  I said we needed an older dog, one that didn't need so much exercise.
Well, Roy still needed lots of walking, but after my head injury and surgeries, he was also chill enough to stay with me on the couch.  Then he got me out, and got me moving.  So it worked out.

When we were looking for a dog last January, I said, we don't want a young dog.  We're old, we need an older dog.
Then I saw Naya's face in a photo that Karen of http://thisoldhousetoo.blogspot.com sent me, and I knew she was my dog.
Several times since then, I have thought, oh dear, what did I do.  Naya is a live wire....with lots of energy, who needs to walk EVERY DAY.
And who knew?  That's just what I needed, too.
30 lbs lost, and a whole new perspective about it.
I find myself out there, in the cold, the rain, whatever; and the air is fresh, and I am energized and happy to be out there.
Happy to be doing it for her, for me.

I came back in, and picked up the weaving where I had left off.   Loving this hand dyed organic cotton/bamboo warp, and loving the weaving draft, too.



I made myself two cups of tea while I was weaving, and they both tasted like crap.  It took me a while.....duh.....to check the milk.  Yep, outdated.
So I finally had my cuppa tea when I was done weaving....then I soaked my sore muscles in the hot tub, watching the sun go down.



I made myself a killer green salad, which I had with a glass of pinot grigio, and I had leftover
vegetarian hash brown bake which I made last night.....to die for, I'm telling ya.

So let me just say, I'm grateful.   Less headache, a lovely home, a loom I love, doing what I want to do.  Loving my family even if I don't see them as often as I'd like to.

Life IS good. 




Your life is exactly what you make it.

I choose contentment, every day.