But I know it's not.
Today is another day. I pulled myself together. I needed to get my oil changed in my car, for the trip. When I got to the studio after that, Next was waiting at the corner of the house, peeking around to see when someone would come in the driveway.
I could hear him purring as I got out of the car.
I picked him up, and nuzzled his head, and told him how much I loved him.
The breeze picked up, I lifted my face and saw the golden leaves on the green metal roof of the barn, the sun glinting off it all. My eyes teared up again, and I thought: "It's still a beautiful world. Amen. It is."
Headache be damned.
I am just one person. If I am here, or not, the world will still spin, life will be lived. The days will dawn. The wind will blow, and the sun will shine. Babies will be born. All the things I am afraid of can not change any of that. So really, I ask myself, what is there to be afraid of?
Lois did the Fiber Festival all by herself this past weekend.......succesfully I might add. You're not surprised? Neither am I.
If you look up "dependable" in the dictionary, her picture SHOULD be there.
I didn't even make an appearance, that's what a wreck I was.
This morning, I did manage to wrap it all up from a business point of view, and then Lois said, "You'd better put your towels on your web site, now that the show is over."
So we took some pictures, and I came home and put them up, and sent out a newsletter.
But for all of you who don't get my newsletter, consider yourselves notified.
The TOWELS are up.
They have been prewashed, but not ironed. I don't do that.
There are quite a few of them. Look for number available below each picture.
You can get to them with this link.
And with that, I have to go and pack. Mundane tasks to pass the time, until it's time.
A friend said to me on the phone today, " You might as well be hopeful, as bleak. It all takes the same amount of energy."
I said, "amen, dear friend, amen."