I realize now that for the worst of the 3+ years I had the monster headache, my brain was a bit more than scrambled. I remember thinking that I had to move to Maine. I was a bit obsessed with it for a while. Not that I don't love Maine, I do. But I wouldn't move there, when my family and friends are here. I would visit, vacation, but not relocate.
Yet for a time, it seemed the only logical option.
Now I know, I was just trying to find a solution to my pain, a geographical one, to be sure, that would not have really helped one bit. But when you are in relentless pain, you don't see that.
I also am quite aware, now, that I gave a lot of lip service to slowing down, cutting back, and generally not pushing myself on a daily basis. I know that it was just lip service, because now I am really doing it, and I know how it feels.
I wasn't doing any of it back when I was talking it up. I wasn't "there" yet.
I am now.
As we get older, we have to adjust, adapt, and somewhat reinvent ourselves. Our bodies don't do, nor do they want to do, what we have done in the past. That's been tough for me, I admit it.
But acceptance of a different stage of life is not that bad, really. It definitely has its perks.
Or taking Roy for a leisurely walk down a path we've never been on before.
Weaving a little M's and O's.
Oh, joy! Getting my E-lift installed on my AVL, at last.
And getting back to weaving on my towel warp.
Hip be damned.
Wondering if I will ever make the move to a computerized loom, or if pegging my dobby bars with a
glass of wine will be enough for me.
Making a gigundus salad from my Farmer's Market foray.
And eating LOTS of it.
Yes, there are so many perks to slowing down. I am trying to enjoy them all.
I am so looking forward to retirement and slowing down. I still have about 7 years. Then it's rocker here I come and all the knitting and reading my time will allow.
ReplyDeleteliving the dream Hillie!!!! enjoy!
ReplyDeleteIt's a beautiful thing :-)
ReplyDeleteThank you for your insight. It helps me figure out this stage of life. I appreciate you being so candid.
ReplyDeleteThank you for giving voice to a lesson I am tryingoing to learn.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Rose
Hooray!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am right there with you! and loving every minute!
ReplyDeleteHi Hilary, I'm off to rug school tomorrow and hope to see how much I already know. Always wanted to go...so finally. Yours and Roy's trail looks ideal and I hope it makes for a habit forming path. Glad you got your auto-thingy for your loom and that it helps. The towels are gorgeous, as I have 2 of them and enjoy them so much. Still waiting for the you-know-whats to get caught. Good post on that, great for anyone to read who hasn't worked at a prison.
ReplyDelete